Day after day I feel so bored with my life, Astagfirullah.. I feel not satisfied with my job now, I realize that It's all my false that I do the worst thing in my life 5 years ago, but it's not time to regretting my life, because God just give me once of life, so I must do the best from my life..

I want to give happiness to my parents and also my beloved daughter and also my beloved husband, is it the money the first? I wanna be a good Mom and also a good daughter, I wanr to have great job so that I can buy whatever I want, then I wanna be a good Mom after I get the great job, I feel if I already feel a great position of a job, I won't be too obsession of my self like this... God help me, please give me the best.

I don't want to make my life be so hard, but I also want to make all of people all over me be happy, I want to be a good mom, I don't want to be apart with my child, I want to be an English teacher, A GREAT ENGLISH TEACHER,,, what can I do?? God... please help me...


Everyday is a bored in my workplace, it's because I'm not suitable anymore with situation like this... I want to the more thing that I can, I want to teach somebody and about my beloved subject, of course, I want to teach English so I will get much more experience and also more knowledge when I teach English...

Actually I really confuse with my mind, it seems that I want to both of job, be the career woman or be an English teacher? Both of that is what I want so bad right now... God, please give me a peace of my heart...

PHOTO ALBUM

Sometimes people that we hate when we were still teenagers are people that we need in our future... This is riddiculous when our best friend in our school be so far from us in distance and also soul... But no worry, because now I have someone who always make my days be cheerful and also so much passion... She is my beloved daughter.
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She will always makes my day be grateful and full of joy... never misremember her.....Thank's God that You send her to me....

SYIFA NAYLA

Here is story about a little girl named Syifa Nayla.... She is my first daughter and she was born on September 10 , 2006. This is my first experience to be a mom and to see the differences on her everyday... I loovee her soo much... Syifa is chubby and fussy girl , but she will be fussy and mercurial if with people whose always or continually she meet, she never talk or kidding with somebody that she never know before.. even if she meet her grand mother, but if she meet her for few hour, she will start to speak or even kidding with her... Unfortunately I can't always beside her, because I wanna continue my life to be a career women or one day I will be an English teacher... I want to have a great future to my beloved children... So that I can enjoy my old age without regret....

Actually I wanna always be with her every time , but I'll save it for next time, I'm promise I will have so much time for her.

Everyday is a new spirit, if I feel tired and I see her face, suddenly my body be fresh anymore, she is such a special drug to be always healthy and also happy... Sometimes Syifa said "Why Mama working everyday?" .. actually I'm so sad to hear that, she said that she want to playing with me in home... I really want to do that, but definitely I will do that just if I have enough time to do that... Sometimes I misremember to be wise Mom for her, I try to teach and educate her, but I'm only human and I can't be perfect... Sometimes I say the words that actually i wanted she never say it.

Actually my husband has a big family, and I usually join with them whenever they have such a party or the vacation, it seems that this is my opportuniy to know their identity and also to be completely their family. My mother-in law is so kind, she always help my little family, she never make me feel unwell, she always gives us everything that we need, beside her love, I'm so sad that I never can reply her kindness....


Here is my photo, take when we were have holiday in Bogor, Syifa was so naughty that she wont to stop swimming on that swimming pool, I finish to open her cloth to prepare back to hotel because we start to back home. A little boy whose squatting is Alif, he is my husband's nephew... and it's mean he is Syifa's cousin... and the both boy is my husband younger brother.

Here is Syifa and her father and Syifa with Alif

I will give all of my love for her...

It seems that one day when she grow up, I will be like her sister, because her body is tall, perhaps she will taller than me one day, sometimes Syifa saying the words that make me so surprise, she able to speak like adult in her children age... I think she is so smart, she able to memorize the long or Prophet's shalawat.. She also can sing English song such as "Cuppycake".. it's the long song, but she can sing it although the pronounciation is little bit wrong...



Actually I'm not too serious to be a teacher, because the prosperity of teacher in here is still low, just if I had a chance, I want to be a succes career woman, and one day when there is no choice anymore, I will be an English teacher.. And what I'm doing now is for my provision for my future... What me and my family feel now is just the minutes that we will miss when we get that success... My sacrifice is not in vain, I believe.. Just if God hear my prayer and I always try to be better for each air that I breath, for my beloved children next, for my best future one day.... That's just my hope anyway...

I never feel that she is look like her father and even me!! she is not same as everything on this earth, she is something different, nobody same as her, I'm so be grateful that God give me a cute sweet little girl like her... It send me the best ever I ever had..Syifa and her friends...